So, you want to be a priest.
Or maybe you were just born into it.
Either way, the details rival any
fraternity or sorority initiation.
I only mention sorority because
of my egalitarian sensibility.
We all know at Mount Sinai women
were not part of the hazing rituals.
So, you want to be a priest.
Well get this, right away we learn
and he shall don his linen
trousers on his flesh.
From the get-go Judaism mandates
wearing pants. And it’s so specific.
You can’t just have your pants with you.
You need to, literally, put them on your body.
So, you want to be a priest. Hey, that’s
okay, but pretty soon in you’re told
and he shall take off his garments
and put on other garments.
And now you’re left thinking you
need a wardrobe budget if you’re
going to take this job. And you don’t
have a choice but to take this job
because you’re a Cohen and
that’s the family business.
So, you want to be a priest.
And they try to distract you from
all the details of pants, and
putting on other clothes by telling you
And the fire on the altar shall burn on it;
it shall not go out.
And I guess it wasn’t Morrissey who
first said there is a light that never goes out.
And I’m pretty sure that Morrissey wears pants
which makes me believe in him all the more.
So, you want to be a priest.
And it starts to get a little crazy
up in this Tabernacle when Moses
starts sprinkling oil and blood
on all the initiates.
And they’re told
And you shall not leave the entrance of
the Tent of Meeting for seven days
and seven days is a long time
to stand anywhere,
wearing the same pants
covered in oil and blood
eating the gifted flesh
tending to the flame.