[Isaac told Jacob] Do not take a wife from among the Canaanite girls . . .
These are things I tell my son
in the same way that Jacob told
his son things…
Be nice.
Don’t drive faster than
the signs tell you.
Don’t judge the Canaanite girls
or any of the girls, or any of
the people.
Eating lunch is important.
Lead up to it by
eating breakfast.
Do the things you need to do
well before the deadlines
to do them.
Practice. I’m not sure what
but whatever it is
practice.
Try not to let us see you rolling
your eyes. We know they’re rolling,
but we don’t need to see it.
Be generous. Don’t focus on
what you’re owed, but what you
can give to make it better.
Be even nicer.
Marry a nice someone or other.
Have kids, or a kid, or no kids.
Make them read this.
Be comfortable knowing they’ll
ignore it until it’s time to
share it with their kids.
Be nice to your kids
even when they do the things
that make your hair fall out.
Like Jacob, I won’t be here forever.
So hold onto this.
The end is coming.
Don’t rush to get there.
There’s nothing after.