Naso — count
If I chose the life of a Nazir
whether temporary or forever
how would I do with the restrictions?
No grape products –
Would it count if I found myself
in a vineyard? I live in California
and you can’t run a red light
in this town without finding yourself
in a vineyard.
I went to a wine tasting recently.
Is this restriction retroactive?
No cutting hair –
I wish I knew about this in the 90s
when I had the confidence to
strut around in a mullet.
I would have been a natural.
Does a mullet count?
Are people shipwrecked
on desert islands automatically
Nazarites? I hate shaving.
Sign me up for the holiness.
Avoid dead bodies –
I assume this means human dead bodies,
as house fly carcasses are everywhere.
Do they count? As the weather heats up,
I dispose of their bodies like an insect mafia.
I try to help their community.
I hold out my finger for the living ones
hoping they’ll get the message
and fly on so I can walk them outside
and let the whole world be their house.
Does this count? Oh, God – separate me
from the defilements of my days before today.
I’m ready to be holy.